A few months ago, I promised to write a post on forgiveness. Here it is. Before you bite into the meat (or beetroot if you’re vegan) of this post, let’s lay the foundation for forgiveness.
Undergirding every act of forgiveness is Love, but we can’t stop there. God is Love, which means God is the foundation of every thought, word, and act of forgiveness. But, what is Love? Love is Oneness without otherness. This is the Substance of true forgiveness.
“Forgive” and “forgiveness” are mentioned in the Holy Bible 66 times (combined). That’s enough for you to know it’s important. Christ left only one model prayer – the Lord’s Prayer. Forgiveness is included in that prayer: “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” The open-hearted willingness to forgive is a sign of spiritual maturity.
I will continue this post in question and answer format, divided into two parts. I believe this is the best way to approach this topic. Some answers you may not agree with. Should that be the case, ask yourself these two questions:
- What is it I believe here?
- Is what I believe consistent with God being the only Presence or have I introduced another presence?
Can I really forgive and forget?
Don’t hesitate to forgive because you think forgetting is required. Some hurts seem like footprints in concrete – they just won’t go away. However, they are not as permanent as they seem, so don’t put off forgiving until a later day. Most often, that day never comes.
Forget about forgetting. Once you take care of forgiving (in the right way), the forgetting will take care of itself.
Why is it so hard to forgive?
The crux of all offenses, and the need to forgive them, is duality – a belief in otherness. The reason people find it hard to forgive is because they begin by trying to forgive the offender rather than the offending belief in otherness.
Oneness is the solution. First contemplate your Oneness with God; follow that by contemplating the offender’s Oneness with God. Finally, contemplate your Oneness with the so-called offender. (In your contemplation, remember God is both Infinite and Indivisible.)
What is forgiveness, and why is it so important?
Sadness, anger, dislike, and hatred are emotional states. Forgiveness does not tarry in human emotions.
It’s true that once you’ve forgiven someone, you do feel an emotional uplift – something akin to euphoria, but it’s not because of the forgiveness. It’s because you dropped a burdensome weight you had no business carrying. You’re free and you know it.
Let’s return to our spiritual starting point: God is the only Presence and Power. Turn your attention to the word “only.” Sit with it a few seconds and you will be reminded that there is nothing besides God.
True living is a life of Power – a life impossible to live when you believe something exists other than God. That “other” presence can be a person, or even an activity. To live your best life, God must be All, and All must be God. There is no other way.
Is there someone in your life whom you won’t forgive? Why? Be honest with yourself and acknowledge that it is because you:
- believe they (or what they did) had power to negatively impact your quality of living.
- believe they had power to disturb your emotional balance.
Think about what they did and answer these questions: Would God do it? Then, who did it? Did a name pop up? If so, you can see that you believe (or seem to believe) there is a Presence other than God. Duality has sunk many a ship sailing on the sea of Life. Don’t be that ship!
Why is it important to forgive? It has nothing to do with the other person. It has everything to do with honoring God as the only Presence and Power. This is forgiveness.
How do I forgive?
If you are asking this question, you’ve taken the first giant step towards forgiving – the willingness to forgive. Willingness makes the next steps easier. Next month, in Part 2 of this discussion, we will dig deeper.
Absolutely Yours 
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